Spork Fashion

The Birkin bag is like the endangered California condor. There are few in captivity, and even fewer out there in the wild. I have never seen a Birkin on anyone’s arm. They are the rarest of handbags. Due in part to the exorbitant prices (which start at around $8,000 for the “starter” model, and go up to $30,000+) and in part to to the stranglehold Hermes holds over these bags. Everyone knows of the infamous “waiting list” for a Birkin - there are even waiting lists to get on the waiting list. But Michael Tonello figured out “the formula” and shares it in this fun, frothy memoir.

Bored with his career as a makeup artist and his life in the States, Michael leaves it all behind to live in Barcelona. He goes on a whim, and there aren’t many career opportunities for an undocumented ex-pat. He starts selling some of his designer wardrobe - many items never worn - on eBay, and hits pay dirt when a silk scarf in a little orange box sells for more than he ever dreamed.

Michael soon becomes the Hermes Queen of Ebay. Living in Barcelona, he has access to more Hermes at better prices than many of his Stateside clients. It was some of these clients that introduced him to the world of Birkin bags. After several stumbles and zero luck, he finally figures out that if he spends several thousand dollars in Hermes before “popping the question,” he has much better luck. Over the years, Michael has bought and sold millions of dollars worth of Birkin bags - more than most Hermes employees will ever see.

Bringing Home the Birkin is better than most beach reads. It is a fun, engrossing read. Be sure to pack another book for your long weekend, as you are likely to breeze through this one in an afternoon. Michael is an engaging storyteller, personable and well-versed in his topic, without coming off as spoiled or snobby. After all, to him, this is just a job.

My one complaint with the book is that there is not enough conflict. Michael can’t buy Birkins, then figures it out, and boom - Birkin bonanza. It’s all roses for him until the end, when one of his Birkin shoppers holds a bag hostage. That story is bizarre and hilarious. I want more like that. There is some hint that Hermes has caught on to Michael, realizing he is a reseller, but no repercussions come from that - by that time, he is ready to retire anyway. In the photos section of the book (which could use more Birkin photos, but then again, could it ever be enough?) Michael shows photos of Birkins that have been bought and sold multiple times - there has to be a story there.

But that is really a minor detail. Michael has a captivating storytelling style, and it is a story that no one else has to tell. Buy it, buy it, buy it!

Did you buy it yet?

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